How to restore your child's self-esteem and confidence and succeed in discipline with 5 minutes of 'special play' a day

Simply responding and interacting appropriately with your child during daily activities

Developing a child's cognitive , communication , and social-emotional skills

There is a theory called ‘ Responsive Teaching’ .

When parents interact with their children with immediate and sensitive responses ,

You can get much greater results than playing with an expert for an hour .

Allowing the child to lead their own play or activity

Developing your child’s curiosity and initiative

This means that you will have a desire to learn more on your own .

If your expectations for your child are excessive

Because a child's confidence or self-esteem does not develop from a young age ,

Unconditionally acknowledge the child's process of exploring the world during infancy,

I would like to say that building a relationship of trust is really important .

<The impact of stable relationships on discipline>

But if we think about our interactions with our parents when we were young ,

The younger you are, the more likely you are to notice that most of your day consists of instructions from adults .

>> Wake up , get dressed , brush your teeth , eat breakfast quickly and go to school . I need to get in the car quickly ~ Wow

I'm sure you remember hearing the same thing .

Although it is important for children to explore the world independently ,

At the same time, they comply smoothly with parental sanctions.

This means that it is important to learn about the rules of the world .

At this time , when the child disciplines or gives instructions

If you are having a hard time listening to others better than your peers ,

Before I tell you how to discipline ,

First, have you established a trusting relationship with your child through sufficiently responsive interactions ?

I would like to ask a question .

Children who have formed a stable trusting relationship with their parents

They use their parents as a secure base and social reference when exploring the world .

But if the safety foundation is unreliable ,

Children may tend to make their own judgments rather than referring to their parents .

That's why I need time to check what my relationship with my child is currently like .

<What is special play time?>

As stated on the U.S. Department of Health Services (CDC) site ,

Invest at least 5 to 10 minutes regularly every day.

Emotional exchange through ‘ special play ’ time is

It is a great help in strengthening your relationship with your child .

A concept first developed by psychologist Sheila Eyberg in the 1970s ,

Sit and do activities with your child for at least 5 minutes a day .

You should engage in activities such as drawing , playing with dolls , and playing with blocks, which have no standards of right or wrong .

No questions or commands should be given .

You can think of this time as a time completely led by the child .

<How to utilize special play time>

• Praise : Rather than just saying, “You’re good at it,” it’s better to specifically say, “I really like stacking blocks high,” because kids hear that all day. For example, if a child gives an adult a chance to play while playing, he or she may say, "Thank you for taking care of Mom or Dad."

• Reflect : This involves repeating part of what the child says. The act of repeating words like this shows the child that we understand you and are listening to you . In particular, focus on the stories you want to hear more about. For example, if a child says, “I’m reading a book right now!”, it’s enough to just repeat “00 is reading a book.”

• Imitate : Imitating the child’s actions during play. This is the process of letting a child know that when he or she takes the lead in play, the child's behavior is followed and acknowledged. If your child is stacking Lego blocks, stack them in the same way. If your child draws dots on paper with a crayon, draw dots on paper with the same crayon.

• Describe : As if you were watching a sports broadcast, you are describing exactly what the child is doing. Have you ever seen a sports broadcaster give instructions and control by interfering with the players by telling them to do this or that? Simply explain to your child what you are seeing. For example, if your child puts an orange block on top of a tower, you can say, “You put an orange block on top of the tower.” Behavior reading is enough to show interest in your children's behavior and show them that you are focused on them.

And one thing to remember is ,

If you can't truly enjoy this time with your child,

It's of no use .

You must convey through words and actions that this time with your child is precious and joyful.

Children will also enjoy this playtime and be able to form attachments with adults .

<When is the best time to have special play time?>

Even if the special play time is short

Because it is better to do it regularly, every day ,

Find time to do it well without missing it according to our family's timetable.

It is recommended that you choose .

Before dinner ? after ? Before going to sleep ? It could be this.

**Are you looking for a play method that helps you form attachment with your child and a more effective way to discipline your child while playing?

Please request a consultation regarding Teacher Minjeong’s PCIT class!**